#MySwanseaXmas

It’s 2014 and as it was meant to be in all new years, it’s time for breaking resolutions. To be fair, my resolution of writing here once a week was so 2013. But I did receive a message from a cousin a week or two ago that read read quite simply: “So you’re alive!” And lo! It’s true, I am alive and doing well and, well, distracted. Or at least I have been distracted. And for what it’s worth, I drafted 60% of this post on the 29th of December. Jokes aside, I really do plan on being better.

I’d been anticipating the Christmas season since August. The reason being that I knew exactly what I wanted to be doing over Christmas while abroad. I knew Megh would (probably) be going home for Christmas and that I would likely be left to defend for myself. Unfortunately, in the same way that I kept forgetting to update this blog, I also kept forgetting the make the arrangements I wanted to make for Christmas.

Seven years ago when I traveled Europe for four months after high school, at the very tail end of my trip, the last thing I did before returning to London to fly back to Canada was visit an old nanny of mine in Swansea, Wales. Now on one level this was a very strange thing to do because I was six weeks old when my mother went back to work and Lucy started caring for me and she only took care of me past my first birthday. So I had no real memory of her when I went to visit apart from a few old photographs I’d seen of me in her care. On the other hand, it turned out to be one of the most natural things and a wonderful experiences of my trip. I was only there for a couple of days, but the time I spent with Lucy, her husband Nigel, and their two young children Phoebe (5) and Zoe (3) was one of the best experiences I had on the trip.

In mid November, knowing that Megh would be for sure going home for Christmas, I did finally get around to emailing Lucy about coming to Swansea over the holidays. She had not known until that point that I was abroad in London again and here I was basically saying, “if you don’t invite me to Swansea for Christmas, I’ll be all alone. No pressure!”  Of course she said yes and so of course I was relieved and thrilled and a little bit worried. I felt appropriately guilty for inviting myself and worried that my presence would be a burden over the holiday season.

On the day I was meant to travel to Swansea by train, on Monday December 23rd, I awoke to news that really high winds would cause severe delays throughout the day in southwestern UK due to speed restriction but that it would get worse later in the day. With my train scheduled at 6:15 pm after a full day of work, I chose to leave a bit early to try and minimize the delay and not arrive too late in Swansea. So in the rain, and missing a bus or two in the process, I managed to get myself on a packed 4:15 pm train and find a seat. I was soaked through but would not have to stand for the length of my journey. As the train started moving I thought to myself, “This isn’t so bad. With any luck I’ll arrive just as I was meant to arrive around 9:20 pm.” Yeah, right. With the wind and torpid pace we were forced to travel and stops due to flooding and trains ahead of us on the tracks, I didn’t pull in to Swansea until 10:30 pm, over 6 hours later. I’d been communicating with Lucy by text all day about the delays, but I still felt pretty lousy being so late.

But there they were, Lucy, Nigel, Phoebe, and Zoe all on the lookout for someone they hadn’t seen for seven years and who’d had the audacity to invite himself for Christmas. What’s more is that they’d prepared a big meal but hadn’t eaten because they were waiting for me. Despite all of this, they seemed genuinely cheerful and happy to finally have me there. Dinner didn’t get served until 11:30, and we were up late chatting and getting reaquainted.

(Meanwhile, Toronto is being buffeted by an ice storm that would see hundreds of thousands of people without power, many right through Christmas.)

The following day, Christmas Eve Day, I had been assured we would be up early, running around all day. The day began with a visit to Nigel’s sister’s and then to Lucy’s parents. At around 3 ish, we’d stopped in at a local diner and absolutely gorged ourselves. It would not be the last time. After lunch a stop at one of Nigel’s friends and then back to their house on the outskirts of down to settle in. There was more food, some Christmas television, movies, and the highlight, an old VHS with footage of a young Lucy and an even younger Christopher. Aside from a very large forehead and rolls that I have since stretched quite thin, the best parts were of people that are, sadly, no longer in my life. My father’s parents Pat (Grandma) and Wilf (Gramps) Wheeler. My father’s sister Beth. A very young Darren Hutz, a childhood friend of mine who would die weeks after Christmas in a hospice in Toronto surrounded by his loving wife and extended family. It’s been years since my Dad’s parents and sister passed and years since I’ve seen or spoken to Darren. But there they were, half way around the world, celebrating Christmas with me and my adopted Welsh family.

On Christmas we were up early and at the gifts. I exchanged a few small gifts with the family but for the most part I watched. It reminded me of a time when my brothers and I all shared that wide eyed excitement over cracking open our gifts. Of course now we are just happy to have time together over the holidays, but it really was nice to have a brief glimpse back at the excitement over Christmas that you can only have when you’re young.

It’s worth mentioning that this is the first Christmas I spent without my family. It was also the first Christmas Kevin spent without the family. I was in Swansea with the Carr’s, Kevin was in Toronto with Ursula, and Mom, Dad, Grandma, and Scott were in Haliburton. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt to break that annual sacred tradition of Christmas with the family. On the other hand, that would never have lasted, it was inevitable that we arrive at this point. In the coming years I look forward to spending Christmas with Meghan and her mother Judy as much as I look forward to the next time I’ll have Christmas with my own family.

For Christmas lunch the family, Lucy’s parents, Lucy’s sister, and I all went to Harvester. The Harvester has a bit of a local cult following and was packed for their Christmas special. Needless to say we feasted like kings before retiring to Lucy’s parents for some raucous but spirited board and card games and more food. The scene at Lucy’s parents started all calm and relaxed but ended in a roar of laughter and fun. Once they all realized I was game for a bit of teasing and competitive fun the night turned in to one to remember. Not that people were wary before, but once the barrier came down it changed the atmosphere completely. Honestly, its hard to put in to words but I just fit in. It was like I’d been a part of the family for years and I couldn’t have had a better time.

That night we went back to the Carr’s house and watched some movies and then slept and slept.  Boxing day was reserved for movies and eating and movies and more eating. I’m paraphrasing, but in Lucy’s words, “on the 26th we will eat until we can’t get up and we won’t get up up even if we could.” It was great after such a busy few days to do exactly that.

On the 27th we made a day of going out to The Mumbles, a small town and series of high cliffs that act as a bit of a breakwater between the Bristol Channel and Swansea Bay. As first experiences of the British coast go, it was spectacular. It’s funny, but it was almost exactly what I expected. Took lots of pictures which I hope to post soon.

After The Mumbles it was back to the house to pack and then off to the train station and back to London. No significant delays this time.

From start to finish, my Swansea Christmas was more than I could have hoped for. I really did find myself surrounded by family who I love dearly. It could have been impossibly hard to spend Christmas away from what I am accustomed to but it was the furthest thing from that. It was easy and wonderful and full of joy. To Lucy, Nigel, Phoebe, and Zoe: Thank you so much for welcoming me in to your home and your family. It was a fantastic way to spend my Christmas and I hope you enjoyed having me half as much as I enjoyed being there.

Hope everyone back home had a safe and happy Christmas. You’ve got big shoes to fill when I come home for Christmas in 2014.

And Happy New Year!

Chris

PS. I had an unremarkable New Year’s Eve. Plans to go to Barcelona disintegrated when I realized how much it was going to cost me (partially because I left it too late). So I just stayed in the flat and Skyped with Megh at 12:00. On the 1st I watched an illegal grainy feed of the Winter Classic. I am finally missing not being able to watch hockey.

PPS. Megh is back from Canada of course, she came back on the 11th. And of course having her back is fantastic. She brought all sorts of goodies, among others: peanut butter (the stuff here doesn’t quite cut it), KD (this holy grail of Canadian staples is seemingly not available anywhere else), and popcorn (seriously, Britain, popcorn in a bag with butter is not hard, it’s also delicious. Megh has a post that she is drafting about what we’ve been up to since her return.

PPPS. Big news for us. We’ve located a new flat. We’ve not moved yet, but we will in a few weeks. I hope to post about this new development once I actually get a chance to see the flat myself. Explanation of why I haven’t seen it yet to be included, natch.